Seasonal Depression is for Squares | Series Wrap Up - No One's Going to Rescue You

I am feeling so uplifted after writing this series on seasonal depression. Not only did I feel a huge boost being able to share my experiences with you, but I got a lot of great tips and information from YOU, my lovely readers!

Thank you. 

If you missed any of the 30 tips, I have links to all of them in the first post, which you can find here. Please pin it and save it to come back to whenever you're feeling down. And speaking of pins, I created a Winter Blues board you can follow right here. I'll keep adding to it as I find more great tips and info on seasonal depression.

There are a lot of important things to take away from this series, and everyone's going to get something different out of it.

But the big thing I want to end with is this -

No one's going to rescue you. That's your job. 

This is a lesson I've learned that applies to a lot of things in life. But today it really applies to seasonal depression. When we're struggling through the fog of a mental illness (yes, that is what it is, even if it's "not that bad") we tend to hope that someone's going to help us.

But trust me when I remind you sweet friend, your mental and emotional well-being are primarily your responsibility!

YOU are the only one who knows what's really going on with YOU. And you may not know exactly what you need, but you're the only one who can start the process to break through the fog and get help.

It's not that your friends and loved ones don't care. It's that a) they can't necessarily know what you might be needing and b) it's not their job to babysit your brain during the winter months.

Be your own mental health advocate and start taking ownership of your emotions, hormones, and moods. The winter months can be hard. Unless you live in one of these places. But most of us don't. So we have to work hard and fight for happiness.

We can do this you guys!

We can fight through the fog and find the beauty in winter! 

Thanks again for reading and commenting through this series.

I wish you all a less SAD winter!

30 Ways to Think Outside the SAD Box this Winter | Part Three

Thanks for tuning into the whole series on beating the winter blues! I've been so encouraged and inspired by all the comments and great ideas. Thank you for joining in the conversation and helping spread the word about SAD!

This is not a comprehensive list, but I feel like we're all pretty well prepared to make the last few months of this winter less of a bummer.

Without further ado, the last ten tips from yours truly... 

21. Brew a hot cup of your favorite tea. Just putting your tea kettle on the stove can improve your mood. The cozy feeling of a warm beverage in your hands is one of the many ways to warm yourself up. Inside and out! (Bonus points if your tea kettle is bright yellow like the one My Love got me!)

22. Plan a vacation. Really research it and get into it... even if it's not going to happen for awhile. They say that the anticipation, planning, and daydreaming about a vacation actually gives us more pleasant satisfaction than the vacation itself! I'm not entirely sure that it's true, but I can't argue that it's not amazing to have something fun to look forward to. I just got a Lonely Planet Travel Guide to Thailand. I don't know exactly when we're going to take that trip, but we both really want to. And reading about it, getting ideas, and looking at beautiful photos will help me feel like I'm already halfway to a new location! Far far away from these grey skies!

23. Take a hot bath with your favorite calming essential oils or a fabulous bubble bath. Don't underestimate the power of pampering yourself on a daily basis. Take the time to breathe deep and really relax. Take the time to put on a luxurious lotion from head to toe after. Put your jammies on the heater to warm up (or in the dryer) and wrap yourself up all nice and cozy before bed!

24. Spend $10 on something you don't really need. New makeup, nail polish, hair accessory, scarf, jewelry, etc. Anything that makes you smile. Even if you already own 30 scarves. or more. Not that I would know anything about that.

25. Commiserate with someone else who struggles with seasonal depression. Be careful with this one... you certainly don't want to fall into the "misery loves company" camp. But it sure is nice to know you're not the only one feeling like this! Follow me on Twitter, Facebook, or Instagram and join the TABA community discussions about looking for the silver lining in these dark winter months!

26. Start a collection of wool socks. And maybe a nice pair of slippers, too. But definitely fuzzy, cozy socks. As many as you need to last between laundry days.

27. Make some of these easy rice cozies to warm you up on cold winter nights. Here's a tutorial I found on Pinterest. I made the girls each a large one in their favorite color for Christmas. Every night, as part of the bedtime routine, I warm them up in the microwave before stories. I will sometimes heat them up and put them in my lap or behind my back while I work at the computer at night.

28. Give yourself some downtime to do something silly. I like to sit under a blanket on the couch and color in a "for Mommy only" coloring book. The smell of crayons and the soothing, childish nature of "wasting time" coloring always brings a smile to my face and helps me relax.

29. Start conversations with strangers. I was just reading in Health magazine that people who talk to strangers report having more pleasant commutes or better experiences while out shopping! I can attest to this, since I have a tendency to talk to anyone with a pulse. I just love to make the long boring waits in the pharmacy queue or the grocery store less tedious by striking up conversation with someone. It helps me feel like the world is a happier place just knowing that two strangers were able to chat and laugh together for a few minutes!

30. Talk to your doctor about meds if you need them. It's hard for people to admit sometime that they need medication. I know it was for me! But you might need it. Between anxiety issues and depression issues, I've had a very good run with Zoloft and vitamin D this year. My doctor is amazing and very supportive. I wanted to be able to muscle my way into mental health or "just stop" feeling bad. But the human body is a very complicated thing and sometimes you need modern medicine to get it back on track. Don't be ashamed to say you can't do it on your own. And don't make yourself suffer needlessly for years, for whatever reason. It's not worth it!

You're not in this alone! 

We all have to deal with varying levels of the winter blues. There are so many ways to
make winter work for you. Please tell me in the comments if you have any other things you do to lift your mood during the winter months!

I'm all ears for more tried and true tips and tricks!

30 Ways to Think Outside the SAD Box this Winter | Part Two

Guess what you guys?

The sun was shining gloriously yesterday! 

So I followed some of my own advice from part one's post and spent about an hour and a half outside in the afternoon! I walked down to into the village center to work on my upcoming participation in the "Home Sweet Home" blog circle this month. (Lots of pretty pictures of Otterberg's church coming your way) And then I hoofed it up the hill to pick up the girls at kindergarten, and we took the long way home so they could make plenty of stops to play and jump and twirl and soak up the sun, too.

I can tell my mood is a thousand times improved. I was so cranky a few days ago. I think we were going on day ten or so of no sunshine.

So I made the most of it. We even got out of the house for a family date night!

When I first started talking to Kirsten (hi, K!) about my issues with seasonal depression, she said she could relate. And also that Dana really struggled with it, too. She called us "solar-powered people" and I just love that description.

SO for those of us who are more solar-powered than others, here are the next ten tips in the series! 

11. Watch some home videos of your kids when they were little and did cute things. Or look at photos of yourself as a child. Remember the innocence and sweetness of childhood. Smile as you think about "the good old days."

12. Turn off every single electronic device that calls relentlessly for your attention and read a novel for an hour. This is obviously not going to improve your mood if you aren't a book worm like me, but if you are, it's really important to take time to read. I can always tell when I've gone too long without giving myself a reading break... I start jonesing for a second to just sit down and focus on one thing. And the chance to escape to a different world for a little while. If you're looking for something new,  here's the Washington Post's top ten list from 2014 (and they have more links and suggestions, too) and here's Huffington Post's list of 30 classics you should read before you're 30. Which I'm definitely gonna have to get cracking on if I want to cross them all off in the next two years ;-)

13. Get out of your house and spend actual real life time with humans. The absolute worst winter I remember here was when we were down to one car and I used that as an excuse to stay stranded at home a lot. I was too lazy to work around J's schedule so that I could have the car, and too lame to regularly invite people over to my house. SO I ended up being home alone a lot with two little girls and a whole lot of pent up seasonal depression issues. Do yourself a favor and connect with people, face to face, on a regular basis through the winter. Facebook is great but it doesn't count.

14. Make sure you have something awesome to be a part of. It really helps to be a part of something that energizes you. I have seen a huge difference in my outlook this winter with my involvement with Grace Studio. I look forward to my classes because they get me out of the house and interacting face to face with people (see #13) and they challenge me body, mind, and spirit. I love my German language classes because learning a language is one of the few things these days that make me feel like I'm really truly using my brain! And I love using my muscles at the Wednesday 90 minute yoga class, plus sweating my a$$ off at Bri's FemFusion class on Friday! It's even amazing to see how excited the girls are for ballet every Thursday. Sure, it makes us busy. But it makes me feel alive and energized, too!

15. Have a family nerf gun fight! (or an adults-only strip nerf battle!) We always end up with lots of laughter, a boost of energy, and a little healthy family competition... all things that equal a lifting of everyone's spirits, plus some good memories. I even get an added smiley-boost from the fact that it usually takes about a week to find all the lost bullets. Every time I find one, I remember our fun little family moment!

16. Paint your nails a ridiculously bright color. Muted colors might be "in" in the winter, but what you might really need to see every time you look at your fingers is highlighter pink or sunshine yellow. Just saying ;-)

17. Make a print of a photo that you think is beautiful (even from your phone!) to frame and hang where you'll see it often. There's a lot of power in the visual reminder of beauty, especially in dreary winter months. If you need to find some fine art prints, look no further than Jesse's Girl Photography {shameless plug} specifically, the sunflower album! I read once that just looking at large images that contained a lot of green and yellow improved test subject's mood.

18. Sit by a fire. We were so thankful to find a house with lots of windows in the main living room and also a big beautiful fireplace. I know I'm not the only one who finds fires therapeutic. It's like sunshine right in front of my face! Plus it warms my toes! If you have an option when you move here, hunt for a house with a fireplace. If not, find a friend who has one and invite yourself over for tea and good conversation regularly!

19. Set your timer for 20 minutes and race yourself to work on something you've been procrastinating on. Just DO SOMETHING! Endless procrastination makes everyone feel so yucky, but lack of motivation is unfortunately another issue we deal with in the winter! So attacking my kitchen mess with violent abandon really lifts my spirits. Rushing around the house to pick things up gets the blood flowing in my veins and makes me happy once I can see my living room floor again. (Now, cleaning isn't the only thing you can do, but that's just one of my methods for a) getting my butt out of my computer chair periodically and b) actually getting some housework done) I really like using those 20 minutes to crush a lame task, then I can get back to my coffee and reading on the couch by the fire!

20. Splurge on an obnoxiously expensive, amazing smelling candle. I'm looking at you, Yankee. It's just nice to have the cozy scent of your favorite candle in your home. Winter is the only time I really burn candles so I consider it a special treat and worth the splurge!

Tune in tomorrow for the last ten tips for battling seasonal depression! 

Thank you so much for all the comments and sharing! I love hearing that I'm not the only one who goes through this. It's especially comforting to be able to relate to folks from all around the world! Please keep letting me know what you think... I'm learning from you, too!

30 Ways to Think Outside the SAD Box this Winter | Part One

Thank you so much for all the positive feedback about this series!

I'm excited to share my tips and experiences, and also to learn from yours! 

{Here's the intro post if you missed it}

Today I'm going to give you the first ten tips and tricks I've learned to battle seasonal depression. They are in no particular order...

1. Spend 15 minutes looking at photos from an event that made you really happy. In her book The Happiness Project {affiliate link here, I highly recommend} Gretchen Rubin writes "Studies show that recalling happy times helps boost happiness in the present. When people reminisce, they focus on positive memories, with the result that recalling the past amplifies the positive and minimizes the negative." I like to browse through our vacation albums. I get equal boosts from looking at all the cool places we've been while living in Europe and also all the good times we've had going back to the States to visit family.

2. Take a brisk walk around your neighborhood and look for the beauty in Winter. It seriously doesn't have to be a long walk, especially if it's freezing outside. Just follow the German saying that "there's no bad weather, only bad clothing" and get yourself out there! Studies show that even on cloudy days, your brain still registers that you're outside and this can boost your serotonin levels. Fresh air also lifts your spirits. And if you're freezing, then you'll walk fast and if you stay out long enough you can totally count it as exercise! (see #6)

3. Dance to loud music for 10 minutes. Dudes I'm a terrible dancer. But we're talking about the comfort of your home. No one has to know. Except your kids... who usually think it's just the coolest thing ever to jump around like crazy monkeys with Mommy. It gets our heart rate up and it makes us smile. Being silly is always better than being SAD ;-)

4. Find a friend who loves snail mail and agree to send each other postcards or pretty letters, especially throughout the winter months. Buy lovely stationery. Decorate it with stamps or stickers. Brightening someone's day will brighten yours, and receiving something in your mailbox besides junk and bills will be a huge boost for you!

5. Take a 15 minute power nap. If you've never considered yourself in need of a power nap, you should reconsider. I'm a huge believer in the power of a short afternoon nap (heck I also love long, lazy afternoon naps, too, but I save those for the weekends when the girls are in a snuggly mood!) I just read this great post about power napping. Shake yourself out of that groggy, tired, unproductive feeling by giving your brain and body a nice little rest!

6. Exercise at least a little bit every single day. I know I know I know. We KNOW that this one is huge. We KNOW why. We KNOW how much better we feel when we exercise. But alas, when I'm feeling blah, I am so much more likely to stay in my sweatpants all day rather than busting out my yoga mat. I'm getting more excited about my yoga journey, so it's been a pretty good Winter for exercise, but I still wouldn't say I hit that target of 5 times a week.

7. Make your home life sparkle. I've noticed that many of the Germans leave their Christmas lights up well into January. I have a pretty paper Christmas star lamp that I leave up all year round cause I love it so much. If Christmas decorations make you happy, leave them up till March! Who's gonna stop you!

8. Buy and regularly use a portable therapy light. When I saw a psychologist on base about SAD, his first recommendation was this therapy light by Philips. {here's my affiliate link } The price was a bit daunting, but it was worth every penny. I was skeptical at first about the effectiveness of these things but I'd had enough people mention them to me that I finally had to give one a try. Also, the doctor was so in love with it that he had it with him right there in the office and demonstrated all the features for me. You can use it as an alarm, program it to varying degrees of brightness, and change the session lengths to meet your needs. The blue light tricks your brain into thinking it's a bright sunny day outside... increasing the amount of serotonin your body makes, boosting your mood and energy levels, and helping you regulate your sleep. I don't care if it's 100% placebo effect, I noticed a difference within a week of first using it two years ago. The fact that it's wireless means I can use it anywhere without having to worry about an outlet. I sometimes cook with it on the counter. I've done yoga with it on the floor in front of my mat. I've used it while reading on the couch. And I'm currently using it right this second on my computer desk as I type. I highly highly recommend you get one to use in the mornings and in the afternoons during the winter. It really really helps!

9. Schedule a Skype date with a faraway friend or family member who always lifts your spirits. Connecting with an old friend always gets me in a great mood, in part because of all the laughter and catching up, and in part because it reminds me of all the good times we had. And I always have a skip in my step after talking to my sisters for awhile. They are such inspiring souls... with funny stories and great energy to share. Reconnect with loved ones!

10. Create a funny Pinterest board and spend 10 minutes chuckling when you feel down. I have created this board "When you just need to laugh" that you can follow to get yours started. Laughing regularly is a legit way to boost your mood for free with zero side effects!

If these tips gave you some good ideas to get out of your SAD slump, please share on Pinterest, Facebook, or Twitter!

And be sure to come back tomorrow for the next ten tips!

Seasonal Depression is for Squares | Series Intro on My Battle Against SAD

When we found out we were moving to Germany for our first duty station, we heard nothing but good things about being stationed here...

"Oh! You're going to LOVE the travel opportunities!"
"I miss Germany sooooo much!"
"The beer, the food, the festivals - it's all so awesome!"
"Just wait till you experience the Christmas markets!"
"You are going to love German bakeries!"
"You HAVE to live on the economy - German villages are so great!"

But never once did someone mention seasonal depression. NOT ONCE.  

Now you might be rolling your eyes at me a little, but it's no joke. Serious Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) is a very common problem in the KMC. (Kaiserslautern Military Community)

Americans move here from all over the world and many, like me, come unprepared.

Those who have lived in this area of Europe for any length of time will understand completely - German weather is SUPER dreary.

I had heard vague things about how it rains "a lot" or how the winter is "really bad" but no one really talked about what it means psychologically when you don't see the sun or blue sky for 14 days straight.

It does something to you man!

So welcome to the intro post in my series on seasonal depression! 

I promise, it won't be depressing ;-)

I really want to raise awareness about SAD and I want to share my story and offer tips that I've found to help me in the past three winters in Germany.

Growing up in upstate NY, I thought I was pretty hardy when it came to "winter blues." I got a little down when it was so cold my nose hairs froze or when the snow started melting into that nasty brown slush.

But I never really got depressed about it.

When I first got to Germany a kind friend warned me about winter. She said "just so you know, it gets dark at 4:30 in the afternoon... and the sun doesn't shine much from November to May."

I didn't believe her.

But she was right! Six hours of daylight would be hard enough, but then you add to that the fact that there is very little actual sunshine happening in those six hours... whew. It's a freaking recipe for disaster!

To give you an example of what I mean by cloudy, this picture is it.

I didn't edit the photo in any way. It was taken on Wednesday, January 7th 2015. This is what I will always think of when I think "Germany in the winter"... it's not that it's particularly cold or snowy, it's just grey.

To give you a specific hourly example, one of the winters I spent here was the "darkest" winter on record. Germans recorded only 100 hours of daylight sun for the entire winter. In contrast, New York State recorded over 300 hours of winter sun that year.

And if you're moving to Germany from an even sunnier State than NY, you are in for a tough time.

When I say it's crappy weather here, I'm not messing around. 

Living OCONUS is not easy, for a host of obvious reasons and for a bunch of not-obvious reasons that I've blogged a lot about. I have heard a rumor that military divorce rates are highest for those stationed overseas, and I have seen from personal experience and that of my close friends, that everyone's marriage experiences strain during an OCONUS tour. Sometimes I have wondered how much of this has to do with the difficulties of seasonal depression. I have even heard of women who had to go back to the States because the weather had them so depressed that they were a danger to themselves and their families.





But there's hope!

There are so many things you can do to fight SAD!

So please take my words to heart if you are new to the area.

Please read this series and share it with people you know who are moving here.

Pin it as a reminder to get the help you need when winter blues strike.





Get involved in this community and support others who are in need of it during the long dark winter months!

Remember in the bleakness of early February that Germany is an amazing place to live and yes, you will survive this winter. And the beauty of Spring in Germany will almost make you forget about the soul-crushing dreariness of Winter! Almost ;-)

Keep tuning in this week to catch all the posts in this series! 

30 Tips to Battle Seasonal Depression:
Part One
Part Two
Part Three
Wrap-Up
Pinterest Board

Though this series is written from a military spouse's perspective/experiences and specific to the Kaiserslautern Military Community, my tips for battling seasonal depression can help anyone out during the winter. No matter where you live, winter can be hard on all of us! You're not alone!

According to Germany, Summer's Over. What a Jerkface.

Um. Dear Germany,

WHAT THE HECK! It's still August dude. DUDE.

I was trying to stay strong and optimistic. I was laughing at the Germans getting out their winter coats. I was refusing to wear a coat at all. I kept telling people who said "summer's over" to bite their tongue.

"There will be nice weather again soon." I said. I hoped.

But I cave. Mostly in the form of hot cups of tea, spiced candles, wool socks, and slippers. YES SLIPPERS. IN AUGUST. Germanyyyyyyyyy!

The girls are midway through a three week school break. I had imagined we'd be spending a lot of time soaking up the sun by the side of the local pool. Instead we're snuggling up on the couch eating popcorn for dinner and watching movies!

I even started a fire this weekend! It was J's idea, but I was all over it. Neither of us really wanted to admit it, but we both wanted a cozy morning fire ;o) And we even finished off our last bottle of last year's boilo! (Drew, we're allowed to drink it in the summer if it's actually fall weather, right? RIGHT?)

Alright Germany. Fine. Though I don't feel I had nearly enough time to bond with my sandals and sundresses, I really do love my boots and scarves. I guess I'll just have to embrace it!

A part of me still hopes you'll grace us with some September sunshine... but fall is lovely here and you can just bring it on if you're in that much of a hurry!

Love,
Someone Who Thrives on Sunshine. And Survives in Germany with Artificial Light Therapy.