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Wednesday, October 24, 2012

I'm Not Gonna Make It. I'm Drowning in a Sea of Pee

So potty training Double Trouble is much harder than I imagined.

And in Lily's case, it's taking much longer than I thought!  I confess that I thought since she started this process (and was pretty good at it!) before two years old, that she'd be done by now.  I was so naive.  Sometimes it's hard for me to remember the wise advice that my nursing-major sister gave me this summer:  CHILL OUT.  She said pediatricians don't usually worry unless a child is still having nighttime bed wetting at 5 years (or even up to seven years with boys!). But still...

I'm in the potty-training-trenches and it stinks.  Literally.  This is one of those times where I think I was crazy to want my kids back to back like this.  WHAT WAS I THINKING?  Between the 2yo and a 3yo and there is just pee... everywhere...

I changed Lily's sheets twice in the middle of the night last night... and she hasn't even woken up for the day yet so I'll probably be changing them again in less than an hour.  I haven't had to regularly wake up with a crying kid in the middle of the night in over a year and a half... and I'm not handling it that well :o\  I have Sam's potty shenanigans to deal with during the day (does the kid have a peanut-sized bladder?  Cause I swear she's on the pot every two minutes) and then Lily's pee-issues to handle during what is supposed to be their sleep time.

I'm so tired.  

So guess what?  I'm planning a party.  I have to.  For my own sanity.  I have to plan this party and cling to the hope that it will happen sometime in the next year and a half.  And it will be a glorious celebration... it will be my "Good Job Jessica, You Taught Two Tiny Humans to Use the Toilet" Party.  As soon as we finally and officially ditch the diapers, man.  It's on.

I'm not sure yet if dads will be invited, but kids sure as heck can't come.  I will ship mine to their grandmas if I have to. But I WILL get this night to myself.

There will be games.  (Pin the poop on the potty?  A dart board with a diaper in the middle??)
There will be treats.  (No-bake cookies look like poop, right?)
There will be drinks.  (Does anyone know of a big girl cocktail that's pee-colored?)
There will be decorations.  (I'm thinking a "clothesline" of panties.  Or a poster with an "X" through a diaper)

So ladies, if you live near me, consider this a Save the Date for my Potty Party... and I'm not even joking this is totally going to happen.  Unfortunately I won't be able to truly celebrate my triumph until both of them can use the potty 100% of the time.  So the party might not actually happen for like, five years.

But now at least I have something to look forward to.

Gotta go, I can hear one of them awake upstairs.  It's probably bath time for my pee-pee-princesses.

When you go to the bathroom today, think of your mom.  She worked so hard for weeks, months, maybe even years! to teach you that little trick.  Send her an email today telling her how much you love her!!!  I love you Linda Rawleigh!  Thanks for teaching me to pee-pee on the potty.  Now I know how much you probably wanted to gouge your eyes out.  XOXO

12 comments:

  1. wow - your sister was right - - you so need to CHILL OUT about this!

    Remember, too that I never did that with more than one child at a time (you were all 2 years or more apart) and I know you're tired of it all, but you *did* start training both of them pretty early! I'm quite sure they will both be able to do this by the time they start school!

    I AM happy that at least *the party* will be when you're done living in Germany, so I may actually be able to either watch the girls or party with you you!

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    1. "by the time they start school" just feels like a death sentence right now! But you're right. It will be fine. In six months it will probably be a completely different animal. XOXO

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  2. I just got the hang of taking #3 to the bathroom one last time before I go to bed. Seems so contrary to all that is good parenting to wake a sleeping baby, but it does help! And he is definitely still in the cloth equivalent of pull-ups because he rarely wakes up dry. I always tell people I started potty training #2 when he was 18 months...and he was 100% reliable 24/7 by about...3 years old. It's crazy how long it takes some kids to finish learning once they've started!

    This too shall pass pretty mama. and soon after that, your house will smell fresh once more.

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    1. WAIT. What are the cloth equivalent of pull-ups? Hook a sister up!

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    2. Oh and I've been trying to take her pee before I go to bed and she won't go for me! What a jerk ;o)

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    3. do you sew at all? the Katrina's Sew Quick Soaker is easily adapted to training pants or night diaper by adding more layers of absorbent stuff and topping with longies. Or if all you have is pockets you can pre-snap one loosely and just call it a night time diaper (this works better if you have had the diapers out of rotation for a bit so they don't recognize them). Or I also have a few pairs of regular training undies that I've added layers of hemp too (top with nylon pull-ups or wool).

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    4. Unfortunately I don't sew enough to attempt something like that. But I'll get back to you for more tips if I decide to go that route.

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  3. sooo glad you finally got the hang of it ;0! (kudos Linder :)
    seriously tho, when kids finally reach the point that they are totally ready - it's so much easier...have you seen progress?
    x0x0x0x

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    1. Not quite yet... well, yes. I have to give her credit for not having any poopy accidents in bed. She does wake up to get those in the potty. And I consider it a very good sign that she cries when she's wet... that's a huge difference from the last time we tried no-diapers because she was not really that bothered by it. And she slept through the night last night... so I feel like a new person after a full night's sleep.

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  4. The party idea had me cracking up! You are too funny! And, I know you are totally going to do that too! I'm am soooo not looking forward to the potty training day...or years as it may be. Here's hoping your potty party comes soon. :)

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    1. It's no fun. I mean, don't worry your little head about it, you'll love it! He'll be one of those potty-pros and you'll be over and done with it in two days. No worries ;o) Miss you friend.

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    2. I sure hope so! :) Miss you too!

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