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Monday, January 21, 2013

Three Things I've Been Thinking About Lately

Just some thoughts that are wandering around in my head these days...

1.  Being part of the Air Force means we have to be ready for anything.  You would think this would be obvious to me by now, but it's not.  I was reminded of it last week when Jesse was "recalled" to the squadron during his time off.  It was only a drill, but the reality of it kind of stuck with me the rest of that day and into the next... my husband could be called up at any moment to go do whatever Uncle Sam requires of him.  Last minute deployment or TDY?  Working round the clock in a crisis situation?  I don't know... stuff like that never really enters my mind because we live in the reality of a pretty normal daily rhythm.  One where, besides putting on a uniform, my husband just goes to work and comes home like he always did.  I'm not saying I want to freak myself out by trying to mentally prepare myself for every bad situation that could come my way... I'm mostly just saying I had a moment where I thought "Oh yeah, my husband works for the Air Force and he's technically on call at all times.  Huh."

2.  Traveling all over the place is way harder for us than we thought.  Dudes we've seen so much already and have totally had awesome travel experiences.  But we definitely thought we'd travel more. Apparently we also thought that living in the middle of Europe would automatically make travel easy and cheap.  But, we live here.  And traveling still costs money.  This isn't a three year vacation.  Oh yeah and we have two kids who I DO NOT like to travel with.  So the reality of "Oh you have a three day weekend?  Cool let's go to the BX and run errands, order a pizza, and watch a movie on the couch" happens far more frequently than our imagined "Oh you have a three day weekend?  Cool let's hop the train to Paris! Or Berlin! Or London!"

And along the same lines...

3.  Being half a world away from your country and family can leave you feeling really disconnected from "it all."  I hate to say it, but in the back of my mind I'm already counting down till our PCS... which I hope will be back to the States.  But "449 days left" would make a mighty long paper chain and would also make me look like a loser who's wishing away her time in GERMANY for cryin out loud!  So I'm still sticking to enjoying what time I have left here!  I'm just being honest with you that I've hit "the wall" and I want to go home.  Home to where I have a phone and can text my family when I'm feeling lonely cause my husband works weird shifts and my kids are driving me nuts.  Home to where there's a drive-through EVERYTHING.  Home to where I understand the language and can watch the Superbowl at not-the-middle-of-the-night.  One more winter here is almost over (I know, wishful thinking haha) and then we're really down to one year left... with many adventures to be had, I'm sure!  And for anyone stuck in what they think is "the middle of Nowhere, USA" and "Man that Jessica girl is so crazy I would totally love to live in Germany for three years" just remember what I'm trying to remember... the grass is always greener.


  1. I love you. Your life is challenging, and living in Germany doesn't make two preschoolers suddenly easy. Living in Germany doesn't make raising two kids with a husband working odd hours suddenly fun. Living in Germany is just like regular life. You just have a different zip code. Don't feel bad for feeling what every other mom of at least two preschoolers feels too. I think you're amazing.

  2. We don't even have kids, and I still feel you on the travel. It's much more expensive than people realize, even when you're already "here," aka in Europe. We don't intend to rack up a ton of debt living here, so that makes it all the more important to be judicious and frugal with our travels! And I hear you on the "wall," too. Yeah, totally there. Thank goodness for Space A!

    1. Ooops, linked someone else's blog to my name--ha!

    2. It's totally true about the finances! We came here to travel but we're also really careful with our money... I guess those two things don't mix that well. Or that frequently ;o)